The "Crashout & Desist" Aloha Shirt
Guilty on All Counts... of Drip.
Step into the courtroom—or the rave—looking like absolute chaos incarnate. This isn't just a shirt; it’s a tort claim waiting to happen. Designed for the discerning legal scholar who spends too much time on the internet, this all-over print button-down captures the true essence of "The Crashout Report" in retina-burning high definition.
The Design: A Masterpiece of Malpractice Set against a base of "Summary Judgment Yellow," this pattern is a subtle-yet-violent explosion of lore. It features a tiling nightmare of:
-
The Florida Man Special: Oranges, gators, and palm trees, representing the natural habitat of the legally insane.
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Corporate Trauma: Hidden Microsoft PowerPoint logos to remind you of the presentation that ruined your life.
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The Defendant: A certain electric yellow rat getting absolutely crushed under a stack of heavy law books (Copyright infringement? We don't know her).
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The Cute & The Cursed: Moo Deng making a cameo alongside chaotic anime eyes and cryptic legal jargon.
More details
- 65% recycled polyester, 35% polyester
- Fabric weight: 2.95 oz/yd² (100 g/m²)
- Breathable and moisture-wicking material
- Regular fit
- UPF50+ protection
- Extended size range: 2XS–6XL
EU GPSR Product Information:
- Manufacturer contact information
- Name: The Menace Crew Merch Shop
- Email: don-p-bongwater-shop@support.fourthwall.com
- Postal address: PO Box 5696 Santa Monica, CA 90405
- Additional information: This product is made for adults. Meets the flammability, and formaldehyde, lead, cadmium, phthalates, azo dyes, bisphenols and mercury level requirements. 2 year warranty in EEA and UK, established by Directive 1999/44/EC.
Size & Fit
Quality Guarantee & Returns
- Quality is guaranteed. If there is a print error or visible quality issue, we'll replace or refund it.
- Because the products are made to order, we do not accept general returns or sizing-related returns.
The "Crashout & Desist" Aloha Shirt Size Guide
| Size label | A | B | C |
|---|---|---|---|
|
2XS
|
20 1/2
|
30.1
|
10.2
|
|
XS
|
21.3
|
30 1/2
|
10.2
|
|
S
|
22
|
30.9
|
10.2
|
|
M
|
22.8
|
31.3
|
10.2
|
|
L
|
24.4
|
32.1
|
10.4
|
|
XL
|
26
|
32.9
|
10.6
|
|
2XL
|
27.6
|
33.7
|
10.8
|
|
3XL
|
29.1
|
35
|
11
|
|
4XL
|
30.7
|
35.8
|
11.2
|
|
5XL
|
32.3
|
36.6
|
11.4
|
|
6XL
|
33.9
|
37.4
|
11.6
|